Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Colorado Be Burnin' Y'all!

...or Wacky Wildfire Wednesday!!! That sounds more fun than what's actually happening though. 

Five wildfires are burning across the state of CO as of this morning.  The worst of the lot is the Black Forest Fire just Northeast of Colorado Springs, where a mandatory evacuation order covering over 24,000 acres has forced about 5,000 homeowners out of their homes.  As of last night, at least 7,500 acres had already burned.  This week's temperatures did nothing to help, with temperatures over 90 degrees, and wind gusts over 40 mph in parts of the state, it's bascially fuel for more fire. 

Meanwhile, another wildfire in Rocky Mountain National Park has already burned another 3,800 acres.  With wildfires both north and south of Denver, I'm starting to really question this whole wood frame construction business on my new house....

I guess the hot, dry and windy conditions are perfect for fires, but assuming these weren't caused by negligence, or some stupid kids burning playboys in the woods, (I don't know, kids are dumb), I guess you can't really get mad about it.  That's NATURE people!  Just like nature destroyed half my tomato crop this year (that's right, I talk farmer now), it has it's way of showing who's the boss of the planet at all times.  Sure we humans can try to do things to exert some control, like use aerosol cans, and throw paper in the trash instead of recycling.  I think the SUV industry was created to show Nature who's boss.  I mean, the Forrester?  if that doesn't spit in Nature's face I don't know what does.  But Nature don't care.  You can throw your plastic rings into the sea, Nature will just hurricane them back into your face.  You can burn non-clean sources of fuel, Nature will just burn down your home and 7,500 acres of forest around you.  And you can try your damndest to create plants, and Nature will just scorch the earth with unbearing 90+ degree temperatures for an entire week!

So what can we do, as human beings, to survive the harsh punishment that Nature dishes out?  Oh I know you think I'm going to say we have to be one with Nature.  We have to be good to the Earth.  Hug trees!  Only buy Prius's.  But if that's what you think, you'd be wrong.  In fact, we must double our efforts.  Instead of saving Sea Turtles, we should ride them like jet skis!  Instead of composting, we should make bigger and better landfills (we can always cement over them and make them into pools or skate parks!  And why buy a Prius when you can buy a Tank?!  So take that Nature!  We'll show you who's boss....even if it means destroying the entire planet!  (and you're next Mars!)

#SeeAnnI'mNotAHippie!

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