Monday, July 1, 2013

The Urbanization of Zombie Hordes in America

This passed (or is it past?  I never know...) weekend I participated in the Run For Your Lives! 5K.  Most races focus on raising awareness for some life threatening illness like Exploding Eye Syndrome, or Ed's Disease, but in the case of this 5K, you were racing for the preservation of your entire species!  Located out on a farm about 40 miles east of Denver, hordes of zombies awaited wave after wave of runners in the hope to feast on their brains....or at least capture their flag.  The runners themselves faced more than the 12 different zombie hordes.  In addition to having to escape the sometimes grabby hands of the undead, they faced several obstacles including mud pits, water slides, and an electrified fence.  Honestly, I think the zombies were the tamest thing they were up against! 

I signed up for this thing back in September, before the idea of running in a race ever crossed my mind.  So I only had to be a zombie for this whole event.  Turning into a zombie was quite a spectacle as well...they had professional make up artists taking you through the whole process of shredding your clothes (which, for several ladies, was uncomfortably situated at the beginning of the zombie tranformation tent), to adding synthetic skin, to the 3 different phases of air brushing and blood.  The final step was getting blood like slop thrown on your body....slop which never seemed to dry for the entire 8 hours we were there...

But you can't argue with the results!

It took about 2 full days, and frantic calls to my female friends to get all the make up off my face.  If that's what it feels like to have 2 lbs of make up on your face, it's no wonder none of the girls in the Miami clubs ever smiled.  They literally could not move their face!

Speaking of zombies, a couple people I'd really like to get infected with the zombie virus are my very sexually active next door neighbors, who woke me up today at 3:45 AM with yet another ungodly early sex-a-thon.  Seriously....3: mother effing 45 AM?!  What is wrong with you people!?  Although, by the violent grunts coming through the bedroom wall, there's a good chance they already ARE zombies.  One day somebody will run for the cure to raise awareness of this terrible disease, and if it works, then I can hate them as human beings once more.

In completely unrelated, but what's become regular Monday morning news, more of my house is complete this week.  This week, we got some of the landscaping started (a LOT of the landscaping started I should say!)

If you know me at all, you know how much it means to me that the American Flag will be waving majestically in the wind every morning, just outside my front door.

Finally, I'm really happy that they finally got the backsplash done in the kitchen.  This was my only design upgrade I chose in the whole house, and I think it really works with the cabinets and granite counters.

So now the final countdown has begun!  Only 23 days left until my closing.  Cue panic attack!  Ack!!!!

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