Wednesday, September 30, 2015

"I Hope You Die Today"

These were the words spoken by a homeless woman, wrapped in a scratchy woolen blanket, carrying a large purse underneath, as she passed me on my way back to work from my haircut.

It felt....unwarranted, to say the least.

I mean, did she really hope I will die?  Does she know something I don't know?!  Was she even talking to me, or to one of the many voices in her head that I assume everybody of that socioeconomic status confer with on a daily basis.  Which, tangentially, makes me think that money really doesn't buy happiness.  If I could be homeless and always surrounded by that much company, who's really winning?!?

 Anyways, back to the matter at hand.  This lady.  Of course now, sitting here in my office, probably protected from her death wish, I am thinking about who she was before life hit her so hard.  Here's what I came up with.  And since that bizzo wished me ill, I am writing this story in Obituary format.  Take that, lady!

Denver Post - Bitchin' Obituaries (or whatever they call that section)
November 14, 2017

Mary Ann Walters, age 57, died today.  Mary Ann Walters, or Mare to her friends, of which she had few, lived a harder life than most.  At the young age of 19, Mare left her hometown of Wyatt, South Dakota, a small ranch town in the middle of nowhere, escaping a failed marriage.  With no help from family, Mary Ann left her abusive husband and made her way south to Colorado.  With little money in her pocket and no people in Colorado, Mary Ann had set herself up for failure.  It was after two years of burning through what little savings she had left, and a heartbeat away from turning around and going back home, did she meet the great oil tycoon William Grant Jr., or Billy Bob as she loved teasing him with.  Mary Ann and Billy Bob became fast friends, and inevitably married just 6 months later.  Those who remember Mary Ann from that time recall that it was probably the happiest she'd ever been.  But even then, a storm loomed on the horizon.  Mary Ann's former husband, whom she never legally divorced, read about the marriage from a local news source, and found his way down to his estranged wife.  One night, in June of 1983, Mary Ann's first husband found her and Billy Bob at their estate in Byers, Colorado where she was giving her husband a haircut, and shot Billy Bob dead, before shooting himself.  Adding to the tremendous grief Mary Ann felt over the loss of her husband was the growing suspicion from Billy Bob's remaining family that Mary Ann herself had actually killed him and her first husband in order to inherit Billy Bob's fortune.  After a very drawn out, lengthy legal struggle, Mary Ann exhausted what personal finances she had, and was forced to leave the ranch.  It was around that time, late in 1990, that Mary Ann was seen again, in the streets of Denver, Colorado.  Having been broken by the loss of both husbands in one night, and poor and destitute, she had turned to drugs and alcohol as her only respite from the evils that had befallen her.  Alas, the devil's bite of heroin had taken over her life, and she slowly lost her mind, ever to roam the streets alone.  Not much was heard of Mary Ann again before her death, but rumors persisted that a woman matching her description would be seen walking around town, carrying the only two possessions she had taken with her from the ranch.  A woolen blanket from the bed she shared with Billy Bob, and a large purse, which contained all her worldly possessions when she first ran away from South Dakota.  Of this person matching her description, it was said that she would mostly keep to herself, her mind addled with drugs, but certain triggers would bring her back to a state of lucidity and the self-realization of her situation would come crashing down.  Even then, it was all she could muster to wish people, often those coming out of a hair salon, terrible curses, and hopes for death.  In the end, it was a sudden myocardial infarction that killed Mary Ann, though anyone who still remembered her would say it was actually just a broken heart.

Mary Ann Walters - may she find the peace in death, she never had in life.
1960 - 2017

Right, so that's what happens when you randomly say "I hope you die today" to me on the street.

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